There is a breaking point. There is a point when teachers and coaches can feel “why bother.” We want so much to do all of the right things for ALL of our students and athletes. That is impossible, we know, but we try. We all start out with so much energy, ambition and desire to change the lives of our students and athletes. Show them the world. Show them their potential. Give them the tools to succeed. Enjoy their ups and help them through their downs. All of the time educating, caring and building. But then we realize that the microscopes come out. The “we are going to watch your every move and listen for your every word.” “We are going to analyze every practice. We are going to demand explanations for every poor performance.” Honestly, we can’t exist under the microscope of some sports/academic parents. It is exhausting. Do we want a blank check to do whatever we want with these kids without being accountable? Of course not. But we do need the trust until we do something really bad. We can’t be 99.9% sure we are always going to say the right words or use the perfect techniques for every child. But we can adjust when our best efforts may come up a little short. Because we want every child we are in charge of to succeed. We really do. But when the actions of some sports/academic parents appear to mean that they don’t trust us, that they have to be on edge, looking for any wrong move or word from us, it is exhausting. The vast, vast, vast majority of the teachers and coaches who have pursued these careers or activities really are good. Really do care. Really do love teaching and coaching these wonderful kids. No one can endure the microscope for very long. Many incredible teachers and coaches have moved on because of the unfair microscope. The scrutiny of everything they do. The questions, the finger pointing, the lack of trust. If the great teachers and coaches are run off, who is left to work with your kids? If you want me to be 100% right all of the time with my coaching, see you later. It won’t happen. If you want the very best from me, you will get that every day I am with your child. I will even give you a lot of my free time as most great teachers and coaches take their work home with them. Laying in bed, trying to sleep, but trying to come up with better ways to work with your child. Don’t drive me away from my passion. Don’t drive me away from these kids I love. I am strong and I love what I do, but I can be beaten down over time. To not be trusted is a killer to me. To not be appreciated is a killer to me. I am giving everything I have, if it isn’t enough, I am sorry. For all of the great sports/academic parents out there, keep supporting and appreciating us. For the “microscope parents” please consider the pressure you are putting on all of us. It is not helping. (Share if you think this topic is worth discussing.) Tom Burgdorf – Gymnet Sports on Facebook.
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